Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize
