I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
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