Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
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