Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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