her vagine was all disorganized.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
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