So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
Randomize
