just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
Randomize
