What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Randomize