She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Randomize
