ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
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