biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
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