i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
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