Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
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