the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
I have post one night stand depression
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize
