Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
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