he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
