I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Randomize
