Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
you win again, gameday.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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