Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize