his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
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