Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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