we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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