Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
Randomize
