brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Randomize
