I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
