just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
