There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
Send help, water and tortillas.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
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