If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
Randomize
