And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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