I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Randomize
