last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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