i think i have two assholes
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Randomize
