Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
Terrible idea I love it
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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