Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
