is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
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