So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Randomize
