I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
She bit a glass in half.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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