I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
