I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
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