I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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