I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
