Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
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