I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
I'm going to save the lime from my McDonald's salad to use in my Corona later tonight.
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
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