is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Randomize
