I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
Everyone says I win the strip club
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
Randomize
