Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
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