we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
