what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Randomize
