she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
I think my nap took me to another dimension
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Randomize