the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Randomize
